The Freight Train of Love
by John Klawitter
When true love comes along, you’re just a bug on the tracks.
I am author John Klawitter, and I’m presenting my novel The Freight Train of Love on the Boomer Lit Friday Blog Hop http://boomerlitfriday.blogspot.com sponsored by the Boomer Lit Group on Goodreads.com
The hero of The Freight Train of Love, the highly successful action-thriller novelist Jack Larch, was born in the thick of WWII, but even though he is a so-called boomer baby, he doesn’t see himself that way. Jack thinks he’s found the fountain of youth. With three or four wives behind him, Jack’s on-again off-again girlfriend of the past ten years is understandably hesitant to commit, even though she has a growing affection for the cranky old genius. But Jack’s wildly carefree youth is now coming back to haunt him in violent and murderous ways…spelling disaster not for Jack himself, but for anyone showing they might be falling for him.
Here are a few lines from The Freight Train of Love:
His small study desk was the usual
mess. I paid his bills, gathered his
checks for deposit and read his letters, which were mostly fan mail except for
one. This one must have slipped behind
the others, because it was dated right after New Years day, the first week in
January. It was sad, in a way, because
it was from the widow of an old army buddy, informing Jack that his friend had
died. See there, how little I knew about the Jack-ster! He’d had another actual friend beside me, and
I hadn’t even known it. I stacked the
open letters in a pile with the silver letter opener on top of them. Jack would come up later in the day, put the
letter opener on the shelf where it belonged and sweep the letters into the
waste can without reading them.
Hey, I was done! I jumped to my feet and snapped off the green
shade reading lamp on his desk. Then I
bounded down the stairs, headed for the door.
Free at last! I could practically taste the
orange Jamba Juice I was going to have for breakfast. I paused on the way out.
“Can I drive your new bird?”
“You can drive my bird any time,”
Eddie chuckled, but I pursed my lips at him.
That wiped the quick grin off his face.
Eddie’d had his shot with me, and he’d blown it.
I gave my voice that school-girlish,
pleading tone, and push my full red lips into a sexy pout, “Please, Jack. Please, please, please, please…?”
It was a good act, but Jack was
definitely not in the mood.
“No, Clair-Bear,” he growled at
me. “Christ, my new car’s a classic.”
I tossed my honey-blonde curls.
“Jack, don’t be such a bastard. It’s not new and it’s not a classic.”
“Marilyn Monroe owned that car, and
she hardly ever drove it. It was her personal
car.”
“Jack, a couple days ago you put my
car on life support.”
There wasn’t much he could say to
that. He sighed, “If you have to go out,
take the Jag.”
I looked over at Eddie. We’d developed our own language. He did a little sideways tilt of his head and
a brief squint of his face combined with a shrug that meant Let it pass.
“No bird for you, Clair,” Jack said
again for effect.
I gave Eddie another look, this one
that said I was thinking I’d like to tell Jack where to stuff his bird. But I pulled myself back from the edge, the
way I generally did with the Larch-ster.
The cream-yellow Jag was a sweet little number in its own right (Jack
ran around telling everybody it was once owned by one of the stars on General
Hospital), and, after all, I needed a ride, and the Jag was light-years better
than a taxi.
“Oh, all right,” I told him, giving
my voice just enough push so he could figure I was not amused. I put on a show, flouncing through the study
like I’d gotten a mad on. My real aim
was to make my getaway before Jack had time to change his mind, but then I
remembered the letter from his dead friend’s widow. I paused, framed in the doorway that led from
the study to the great room, a huge dining hall with a giant fireplace and a
long, heavy table that could seat twenty-six people if they owned the right
film credits or maybe had been nominated for an Oscar.
“You got a letter from Miami,” I
told him.
“The town sent me a letter?”
I’ve already told you; Jack can be a
real bastard. I bit my lip, struggling
to keep my temper. “No, Jack. The girl.”
“It’s Mi-a Mi-i. Mia My.”
He repeated the name for emphasis, then paused, thinking about it. “Jesus, now you read my mail?”
“I’ve read your mail for years,
remember? You let it pile up. Checks from publishers, threats from crazy
people—everything.”
“Yeah, yeah. What did Mia My say?”
Jack wasn’t really listening. His mind was miles and continents away. He was in the southern hemisphere, marching
along with Dunk Stingray as the heroic fellow sauntered out of the barren Andes
foothills after dispatching three Bulgarian assassins.
“Her husband died,” I told him.
I have no idea how those three words
will affect Jack. I was just passing on
the news from a letter he obviously hadn’t cared enough about to open, even
though it had been sitting on the cluttered oak secretary desk in his bedroom
for months. He was in another of his
foul moods, I had his permission to use the Jag, and all I wanted now was to
get out of the study before some other bad thing happened. But I wasn’t fast enough.
Jack stood up with a sudden jerking
motion and shouted without turning around to face me. He was half-crouched over and his sudden
piercing cry was that of a man with a big spear or stage-four cancer in his
guts. The harshness in his voice
startled Eddie, and it was more than enough to freeze me in my tracks.
“What?! NO!!
It can’t be!! How?” Jack screamed
his anguish, talking more to God or the devil than anyone in the room. “How could this happen?!”
As I’ve said, I’d been around Jack
for quite a while, competing with the fast young crowd that wants to hang with
‘the new Hemingway,’ as
he likes to be called. In that moment
I’m sure I looked every bit my nearly thirty-six years…and more. My eyes darted from Jack to Eddie. I was feeling uncertain, and even afraid—not
of Jack , but for him.
“Some rich kid lost control of his
daddy’s SUV,” I told him. “From what Mi-a Mi-i wrote, I think he
saved her when he pushed her out of the way.”
Jack sagged back in his chair.
“Yeah,” he said to himself, talking
in a low, defeated voice, “That’s something he would do.”
I was staring at Jack, shaking my
head, the fun sucked out of my day.
Eddie looked out the window and didn’t say anything. I walked back across the huge open area and
sat next to Jack in the leopard print chair I use when I have to over-the-shoulder
proofread for him, and after a while I gently ran one hand through his unruly
stand up hair.
“Jack, I honestly didn’t know,” I
told him. “You never write him.”
“I send Christmas cards,” he
grumbled. He glared at me as if
everything was my fault, “Go do your shopping.”
I knew him well enough to let the
thoughtless, abrasive side of his personality slide on by. It was part of survival in The House of Jack. I didn’t move. I could hear the antique windup clock ticking
in another room as the silence lengthened between the three of us.
“What the hell, Jackie-poo,” I said
after a while. “I’ve got more purses
than I know what to do with.”
To read the reviews on The Freight Train of Love:
http://www.amazon.com/Freight-Train-Love-Michael-Klawitter/dp/0983037213/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1363105591&sr=1-1&keywords=john+klawitter
And for more about the author click on: www.johnklawitter.com
And please check out the other samples of Boomer Lit at http://boomerlitfriday.blogspot.com.
Tough, straight, you hit them between the eyes, love it!
ReplyDeleteI like that a lot. Good writing.
ReplyDeleteKathleen, I am very grateful for your article on how to sell books on my website. I'm going to try it! I wish that marketing site 1st Turning Point hadn't pulled into drydock...yours would have been a great article to post over there.
Deletej.
Thanks, Claude. I feel an affinity for your subject matter in Hook in the Sky. There is no other scene quite like the haut art world. I brushed against it about five years ago when I met some artists who were doing 'wrapped' paintings that nobody was allowed to see, not even the buyers until they bought them, and then only at 'private viewings' to show a few select friends. Not as showy as Hook, but unique in it's own way.
ReplyDeletej
Wow, that got me interested. Nice job. Will definitely be checking this one out.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Michael. I'll be interested in your reaction. FTOL is the most structurally complex story I've attempted to date and I've got my fingers crossed that I got it right!
ReplyDeletej.
Love the character so far. That one paragraph tells us so much about her.
ReplyDeleteBeth, I got a review from a Neanderthal guy who advised me "women don't think that way." I guess he wasn't used to strong, independent females. Born in the wrong century. (or universe). Thanks for your comment.
ReplyDeletej.
I really like this, your voice comes through. I always like writing like this, that's a little gritty, tell-it-like-it-is. Good job, I hope to read more.
ReplyDeleteThe title grabbed me and your excerpt made me want more. I love strong characters, and the woman in this scene definitely qualifies. Love all the details too: jacaranda tree, mini cooper tire, etc. Good writing.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
DeleteSandy, there is so much good material to read on the Boomer Hop I don't know if I can read everything before next month.
DeleteWell written! I like this woman and want to read more ;-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for your help, Shelley!
DeleteI want to read more. And I enjoyed the trailer, too.
ReplyDeleteWhew! That's funny and Clair sounds like a hoot.
ReplyDeleteI think I got the voice right (hopefully). I met a lot of interesting girls when writing a sports bio for a famous NFL football player. The women were bright, funny, hard-edged, sometimes cynical...generally beautiful.
DeleteHmm, after reading the excerpt and watching the book trailer, it occurs to me that being Jack's girlfriend is like being a wife to Henry VIII...but set in contemporary times. Love the tagline "When true love comes along, you're just a bug on the tracks."
ReplyDeleteThe tagline is something Jack and his buddy used to say to each other when they were young. But now the buddy is dead and the line has come back to haunt him.
DeleteGREAT trailer. I loved today's excerpt too. This sounds like a fun story.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your comment about the trailer. I do my own, using "Power Director" and the same home recording system I record my radio show, Dark Landing.
DeleteThanks Sandy. Maybe you can recommend me to a good agent. The Hollywood dudes I've contacted aren't interested.
DeleteIf I knew an agent to recommend you to, I would. As for Hollywood, many people have said my book (I.O.U. SEX) would make a great movie, but so far Hollywood is silent on the subject.
DeleteGood job, John. Loved the excerpt and trailer. I like the spunk you gave Clair.
ReplyDeleteJohn, I'm so very impressed with your writing. Crisp. Concise. And extremely clever. I love "Actually the bet was for four letters stronger than the word date..." Nicely done. And I, too, like your tag line, "When true love comes along, you're just a bug on the tracks." Ain't it the truth? Great job and if the rest of it is as good as this - you got it right!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Mutinous. Freight Train is the most complex script plot I've ever tried. Remember how S. King did Stand By Me, the main story bookended with another story? Well, I tried to go him one better with both the main story and a back story both moving forward. Only you, the readers, will be able to tell me it works (or not). Best, j.
DeleteI very well remember what the King-myster did with Stand By Me. If you can go one better with that one, you've really done something. Best of luck to you, you're a heck of a writer and I hope you pull it off!
DeleteBlessings & Cheers!
Marsha
You had me at Redskins-Cowboys...he he. I'll have to get this one.
ReplyDeleteSaraphen, those Cowboy Cheerleaders are America's True Team.
Deletej
Tough writing, tough lady!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Claude. I hope Hook is getting the hot sales it deserves! best, j
DeleteI have had similar comments about my male characters. "A man would never say that." Well, sorry, but I think some would. And just as all men are not the same, and all women are not the same, some women would think like Clair. I like her. I like your writing style a lot.
ReplyDeleteLynn,I thank you. As you know, voice is a most important ingredient, and when an author gets it right, other writers and most readers generally can tell.
ReplyDeletebest,
j.
You've made me like Clair, and I want to know what happens to her. I, too, chuckled at the tag line and the "four letters stronger" line. And I've got to admit the Dallas cheerleaders are superior, even when the team isn't. Packers use local college girls on a limited basis, and they tend to be wholesome, farm-girl types.
ReplyDeleteLinda, Clair meets a positive force, a strong woman with a legendary ancestry (no, not a comic book character, a real person named Mai-My who has come through her own time of trials), a fierce and yet compassionate lady who helps her understand herself and so survive...but it is a narrow passage, particularly at the end. I like to think of FTOL as 'a classic war romance wrapped up in a murder mystery folded into a love story.' In the last millennium I was a big fan of talk show shrink David Viscott, and feel as he did (he died too young, suddenly and tragically) that the seeds for the things we feel and say and do are sown in our past. Sounds simple, I guess, but as an author it helps me understand a bit about a complex character like Clair, who is so successful at business and yet lacks the confidence to go along with what her heart knows to be true.
DeleteBest, j.
P.S. As for farm girls, I believe there is much to be said for wholesome, having myself been born on the family farm in Northern Illinois, homesteaded by my mom's family in 1843.
I love the voice in this! Fresh, fast-paced, smart. Very well done.
ReplyDeleteGood character...one you love to hate, or is hate to love? Well done!
ReplyDeleteKathleen and Shelley -
ReplyDeleteTwo prayers we can share:
"From your mouth to God's ear."
- Old Jewish prayer
"May we all end up rich and famous."
- Modern day Hollywood supplication
I like your characters.
ReplyDeleteHa, ha, ha, I like them, too. The instructors all say writers should like them, and as for the villains, at least understand them and so empathize in that way. Well, I'm not sure how that turns out for stories about stone cold killers, but Truman Capote would know.
ReplyDelete"Nothing boring ever happens around here." Nice, John. I can identify with that, for sure! I like the way you turn a phrase.
ReplyDeleteCheers! Marsha
I can't figure out whose POV this is, but I like it. Old Jack seems like he will be a fun character and I look forward to more.
ReplyDeleteClair's POV. Clair Moore, not her real name, the ex-Dallas Cowboys cheerleader who now owns the guest house behind Jack Larch's place.
DeleteYou've painted a vivid picture of Jack Larch. I can see how there are plenty of opportunities for conflict based on his personality alone. Good writing.
ReplyDeleteSandy It is hard to give more than an impression in a snippet, but you are right.
DeleteHey Mutinous, with a name like yours, that's not a surprise.
ReplyDeleteI love the image of squirreling away some cash, and Jack playing with his nuts. You're a hoot!
ReplyDeleteSaraphen,true boomers can be practical, but sometimes they are still dreamers as well, and sometimes even wildly irresponsible like Jack Larch. At least, I hope so. Thanks,
ReplyDeletej.
Wow, John, you've had 47 comments, that says it all, I don't think I can add anything more except to say: super well boffo done!
ReplyDeleteHappy Easter, Claude. May the bunny bring you bountiful sales of your great boomer book, "A Hook in the Sky"
ReplyDeleteVery well written, John. And I read in one of the previous comments that a Neanderthal said "Women don't think like that." Good thing writers have a little more insight!!
ReplyDeleteI love your characters! You've done such a great job of showing their eccentricities. Terrific excerpt.
ReplyDeleteSomebody told me I'm supposed to read Jeffrey Deaver, so I read "The Edge" and was greatly disappointed. Then I was told to read Harlan Coben, so I read "Deal Breaker". Wow. Warmed over, self-conscious, poorly plotted Robert B. Parker imitation. The point is, if those guys had such poorly written crap published, there's hope for me.
DeleteYou have such a great, casual style.
ReplyDeleteKathleen, you always say nice things. Thank you. I'm just an old lump of coal, but I'm gonna be a diamond some day. (country western ballad)
DeleteEnjoy the excerpts. The book blub is reason enough to read the novel: When true love comes along, you’re just a bug on the tracks.
ReplyDeleteBut Michael, it is true. I know from experience; like a penny on the tracks, I've been flattened a time or two.
ReplyDeleteGreat scene. I can see this story on the big screen.
ReplyDeleteFrom your mouth to God's Ear... (Old Jewish saying)
ReplyDeleteDo I wait for the movie, or read the book first. I'm loving it.
ReplyDeleteSaraphen, I do adapt most of my novels to screenplay format, but Tinseltown being what it is, I wouldn't wait for the cinematic version.
Deletej.
Wow, so many comments! And well deserved...What a good idea to put them all together, makes sense. I love your snippets, very enticing! I feel I'm there on that racing car, LOL!
ReplyDeleteClaude, you don't want to be in Steve's Porsche with wild Jack driving. (that's your tease for next week's snippet)
Deletej
This is getting increasingly intriguing.
ReplyDeleteWild Jack's problem, he thinks, is that he missed the train years ago. I don't think so. I think he is hanging onto the caboose with one hand, his toes dragging in the cinders, still unwilling to let go. Ahh, romance.
DeleteGreat dialogue! I can see them roaring down the road, discussing business while dodging school buses and vans full of tourists. Good writing. I'm looking forward to reading this book.
ReplyDeleteIf you've been on Sunset Boulevard between Holmby Hills and Beverly Hills, you know how surreal that can be, all dappled Southern California sunlight and huge mansions set back from a big, curving boulevard that could use a few more stop lights.
Deletej.
Thanks for sharing that John! I'd say Jack is a bit of a larrikin! Can't wait to read more.
ReplyDeleteI've got a small excerpt of my debut novel on BoomerLitFriday blog too - Let Angels Fly. Hope you get time to check it out.
thanks and cheers
Noelle Clark
Noelle
ReplyDeleteSurely not a larrikin?! He is simply a poor little joey who has lost his way.
I will be sure to check out LET ANGELS FLY. I hope your new book flies with high sales.
best
John K.
This is really good. I want to know what happens next. I especially like "a thousand pals and no friends" and "freedom of motion."
ReplyDeleteWow, way to build a scene. Very well done!
ReplyDeleteShelly, talk about scene building, I submitted this MS early on to one of the larger and more respectable e-publishers of romance literature and was soundly rebuked for not following the acceptable outline of the romance novel. Ouch!
Deletej
Oh No! You can't have killed Jack off (OOPS, did I say that)?
ReplyDeleteNow Saraphen, you know if I bumped off Jack in the first scene Jack Nicholson would never touch the screenplay.
Deletej.
Very good. "Government plot" heh-heh.
ReplyDeleteKathleen - Hollywood people are funny that way; many are goofy-progressive, and yet when the Dems get in they can still be suspicious and anti-government in odd and crazy ways. I care what any star has to say about acting or directing, but about politics, not so much.
ReplyDeletej.
GREAT action scene, and the dialogue really sings. I wasn't surprised that Jack didn't wear his seat belt -- that was completely in character. I'm lovin' your Boomer Lit excerpts.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Sandy. Jacquie Rogers is doing an interview for her blogsite with three lead characters from FTOL. Clair, Wild Jack and Mia My.
ReplyDeleteJohn, Another great excerpt. I think Jack enjoys being the way he is. Life without responsibility is pretty free, but sometimes lonely.
ReplyDeleteDR,you are probably right about all of that. The sad truth of Jack is that, while he believes the power of true love is so strong it cannot be denied, he keeps falling for the wrong person. In that, Jack the writer understands his characters better than he understands himself.
ReplyDeletej.
So Jack has layers of depth after all. I enjoy the way the narrator manages to be his spoiled little girl and his mother at the same time. Talented lady.
ReplyDeleteClair is a survivor. Thanks for your observation, Beth.
ReplyDeleteJohn K.